Librarian is my backup career.

I used to think if the whole politician/Supreme Court justice/kick-ass tort lawyer career didn’t work out, I would open up a cupcakery. At age seven, I thought it was a rather original idea. Only Magnolia’s existed in New York at the time. Crumbs and other such West Coast chains had not yet opened on the East Coast, and I was convinced I had discovered an under appreciated foodie niche.

Then, of course, cupcakes became a pop culture phenomenon, with entire feature sections of mainstream newspapers devoted to revealing the best frosted baked goods in town. Shortly thereafter, however, Slate issued a statement: The cupcake crash is coming. The bubble, it posited, would shortly burst, and all those seeking careers in the high powered, artery-clogging industry would soon be feeding their delectable delights to pigeons in the park.

Always the realist, I understood that an alternate back-up plan would need to be determined. As a previous post indicates, housekeeping was out of the question. Any sort of sport related activity was physically impossible. And firefighter was off limits– especially given my pyromaniac tendencies.

Today– in the midst of scouring the web for unique and interesting content for my internship– I happened upon an answer. I noticed an NPR article, arguing that like cupcakes, libraries should become the next socio-cultural phenomenon. Conveniently, said article linked to a video of librarians at the University of Washington parodying Lady Gaga. Needless to say, it was magical.

It also established a clear alternative career choice: college librarian. My love of the written word combined with my creepishly good internet search/stalking skills, and I have the perfect resume for the job. In some ways I am more qualified for that career than my first choice– chasing down evil corporations that contaminate small town drinking water with carcinogens, while simultaneously authoring groundbreaking editorials for The New York Times or some such publication. Regardless, I will shoot for the stars, and if I don’t actually reach them, well, then at least I know there is a building not far below begging to be alphabetized.


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